Educate Yourself: Don't be an A-Hole

Ah, the internet....

Yesterday I was casually scrolling Facebook reading various articles that people post and reading some that just had catchy headlines that I might want to read about. I was having my coffee and smoking my cigarette, like I do every morning. An article caught my eye about white girls wearing cornrows and the term "cultural appropriation" also popped up in this article. Naturally I read the comments because, hey, sometimes they're good for a laugh, sometimes people have good perspective, and generally I just want to know what other people think. 

I found that what other people think is also very, very ugly. My mood had noticeably shifted from "hey! it's gonna be a great day!" to "blah. I think I'll take a nap" after reading some of the comments on this article. Among them were, "So? Who cares it's just hair!" to "Well we live in America of course we like things from other cultures" to general history lessons about corn rows, which then became misunderstood and turned into "braids" and how anyone can wear cornrows because hey, Native American wear braids. Then things like, ""I have to wear my hair in two braids everyday because my hair is frizzy." Which is NOT at ALL the same as cornrows. I took notice of how others' opinions made me feel. I debated getting off of Facebook for awhile several times because of the negativity. Discussions about culture, politics, abortion, gay marriage, guns, and other world issues used to be fodder for discussion around the dinner table at large meals such as Thanksgiving with family and friends. But now thanks to social media, I can know damn near everyone's opinion on these subjects, and I fight the urge to tell people "you're an idiot" on a daily basis. But hey, everyone gets their own opinion, right? 

So we've got Black Lives Matter, Blue Lives Matter, All Lives Matter, and as of yesterday with the confederate flag, gun-toting weenies in front of the NAACP trying to make "White Lives Matter" a thing. This really tanked my mood. Racism is ugly, people. You can come from whichever side you choose and post pictures that various news sites dig up saying, "Well but he was a thug" or "He was a bad cop" and put whatever spin on it that suits your views. But you know what? You might not agree with someones LIFESTYLE choices, but someone loved them. We've all seen the recent pictures of Sylville Smith in Milwaukee holding various guns on his social media pages, but that is a LIFESTYLE, not a CULTURE. A lot of people have this confused. Might want to read up on the difference. I certainly don't want to be lumped in with Jeffrey Dahmer because he was a white, cannibal serial killer. 

But you know, I read the article. I read the cultural appropriation article. I read the "(insert life) Matters" articles because I need to educate myself. I tend to whittle down my friends list when I see that some of my "friends" refuse to educate themselves on issues. I could care less who you vote for and I'll never be educated enough to have a political discussion, but when it comes to humanity, I care about your character and your compassion, and generally what kind of human you are to a waitress, a Walmart worker, an elderly person, a child, people of different colors, people of different cultures, people of different genders...I care about how you treat them. There is nothing that will make me unfriend you quicker than when you show me you're an insensitive a**hole.  Usually social media is the place that you find out that people you know are not who you thought they were, and one can lose respect for others with one insult laden comment on a discussion thread. Or forwarding chain mails, scams, hoaxes....do your research, people. No one is giving you free money, a free Xbox One, or a year's supply of chili dogs. 

I find myself at a turning point at 41. I moved back to Iowa and I want to learn about football and become a Hawkeye fan. I find myself wanting to know about issues. Not for discussion purposes, but because I want to be a better person. If there is a culture, gender, or race that is hurting, I want to know why and how I can help. I'm working on reading about the Bible because I just learned that contrary to my religious upbringing, some of it is true, and some of it might be actual stories. Shocker, right?  But I want to know these things. 

I never really thought of myself as an opinionated person, mainly because I don't have opinions on things like politics, abortions, gun control, gay marriage...my "opinion" is to each his own. I always felt like if I had an opinion on those things, really, how would that help anybody? And who really needs to hear it even if I did have opinions on these things? I'm not that special. That's not to say I don't have opinions because in my opinion, Bit-O-Honey, Whoppers, and caramels are the worst Halloween candy ever. I'm going to keep drinking Diet Coke no matter how many health nuts tell me "ohhhh but the aspartame." One Direction sucks. Winter sucks. Android sucks. Apple rocks! These seemingly inconsequential things matter. These opinions matter. If someone accidentally gives me a bag of Whoppers, that directly affects me. 

Your actions and words directly affect others.  Your social media posts affect others. Educate yourself. Learn. Grow.  Don't be an a**hole.